A Family Blessed With Grace

My mother's name was Grace.  She lived a quiet life.  She was a shy woman, she was uncomfortable in social situations, she didn't drive a car and she never expected anything.  She married my father and they raised five children four boys and me.  We were all good kids, we were active in school activities, in sports, in the community and I was a dancer and active in Musical Theatre Productions, but our mom never cheered us on at games and she never sat in the audience with pride.  It wasn't that she didn't love us...she just wasn't comfortable in social situations and she didn't know how to express.  We were not hugged, tucked in at night nor were the words "I love you" spoken. The first day I went to kindergarten I saw a classmate running toward her mom both of their arms open wide.  When they reached each other the mom picked her up and held her tight to her chest as she spun her daughter around. At that moment I knew that was the kind of mom I wanted to be.  My mom never meant to miss so much of her children's life.  She never meant any harm.  She had a sweet disposition and I believe she did the best she was capable of.  My mom never went anywhere far and for sure she never went anywhere without dad.  When she was diagnosed with Pancreatic Cancer hospice was brought in to help.  She held on far beyond the doctor's expectations.  I always believed she held on, because she was too afraid to leave alone.  Remember, this is a woman who barely left the house and never left alone.  Her fraile body could no longer get out of bed, morphine was no longer able to stop the pain and she was fading before our eyes, but she was too shy...too afraid to go...to leave her home alone.  My sweet niece was 2 yrs. old at the time and one of my brothers (her dad a doctor) were at the house checking in on mom.  My brother holding his little Grace (named after mom) leaned down to kiss mom goodnight when the sweet 2 year old without prompting told her grandmother to go be with the angels now.  We don't know where that came from, at 2 years old she was too young to understand death, no one had ever talked to her about angels and no one had talked with her about grandma leaving, but soon after she spoke those words our mother left.  When I was a child growing up I thought I'd like to pick a different kind of mom....someone outgoing and demonstrative.  When I became a mom by my nature I did become the kind of mom wiho bent down with open arms picking my kids up and holding them tight to my chest as we spun around.  I did become the mom who cheered with pride at every event, but my mom's unspoken words taught me important things too.  My mother Grace never spoke an unkind word, there was never any anger in our home, balanced meals were on the table everyday, we always ate together, what each of us had to say was important, we celebrated simple things like homemade apple pie or fresh flowers in the garden, our home life was always peaceful, she had great concern for our safety everytime we went out the door and when we returned she always was interested in how our day had gone.  Life teaches us lessons and without speaking about it my mother Grace taught me that there are many differect ways to express love, that the sweet things in life come in all kinds of packages, that when you're loved you know it, that love for family is unconditional and angels are all around. 

In honor of our mother we now have a new generation of Grace in our family.  Mom has two granddaughters and one great granddaughter all with the middle name Grace.  Greek legend states that the "Three Graces" represent youth & beauty, mirth and elegance.  Our family has been blessed with Grace.